I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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