he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I party with great urgency now.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
