her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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