everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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