idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
