I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize