well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
