I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
