At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
