So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
My life is pants optional.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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