i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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