How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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