Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
