Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
