I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
