You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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