dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
