i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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