What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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