ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
