Cold hands, warm shart.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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