so that wasnt chicken after all
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Sext me about skeletons
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
