I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
