Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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