Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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