There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
