Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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