the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
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