Just fell off a train. Bad.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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