People with herpes should wear stickers.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
