We're facebook friends in real life
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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