YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
