i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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