I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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