I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
