he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
im on a boat
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