So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
