ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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