I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
