how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
