It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I just want to make out with him forever
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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