Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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