when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
