i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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