would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
