i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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