I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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