a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
