We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
