I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
