did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize