I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
